MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: multipart/related; boundary="----=_NextPart_01D08C2B.5C5C9C80" This document is a Single File Web Page, also known as a Web Archive file. If you are seeing this message, your browser or editor doesn't support Web Archive files. Please download a browser that supports Web Archive, such as Windows® Internet Explorer®. ------=_NextPart_01D08C2B.5C5C9C80 Content-Location: file:///C:/D1359234/TheStolenWhiteElephant.htm Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable Content-Type: text/html; charset="windows-1252"
The Stolen White Elephant=
By
Mark Twain
Contents
I. =
II =
III =
[Left out of A Tramp Abroad, because=
it
was feared that some of the
particulars had been exaggerated, and that others were not true. Before these suspicions had been proven=
groundless, the book had gone to pre=
ss.
--M. T.]
The following curious history was related to m=
e by
a chance railway acquaintance. He was a gentleman more than seventy years of
age, and his thoroughly good and gentle face and earnest and sincere manner
imprinted the unmistakable stamp of truth upon every statement which fell f=
rom
his lips. He said:
You know in what reverence the royal white
elephant of Siam is held by the people of that country. You know it is sacr=
ed
to kings, only kings may possess it, and that it is, indeed, in a measure e=
ven
superior to kings, since it receives not merely honor but worship. Very wel=
l;
five years ago, when the troubles concerning the frontier line arose betwee=
n Great
Britain and Siam, it was presently manifest that Siam had been in the wrong.
Therefore every reparation was quickly made, and the British representative
stated that he was satisfied and the past should be forgotten. This greatly
relieved the King of Siam, and partly as a token of gratitude, but partly a=
lso,
perhaps, to wipe out any little remaining vestige of unpleasantness which
England might feel toward him, he wished to send the Queen a present--the s=
ole
sure way of propitiating an enemy, according to Oriental ideas. This present
ought not only to be a royal one, but transcendently royal. Wherefore, what
offering could be so meet as that of a white elephant? My position in the
Indian civil service was such that I was deemed peculiarly worthy of the ho=
nor
of conveying the present to her Majesty. A ship was fitted out for me and my
servants and the officers and attendants of the elephant, and in due time I
arrived in New York harbor and placed my royal charge in admirable quarters=
in Jersey
City. It was necessary to remain awhile in order to recruit the animal's he=
alth
before resuming the voyage.
All went well during a fortnight--then my
calamities began. The white elephant was stolen! I was called up at dead of
night and informed of this fearful misfortune. For some moments I was beside
myself with terror and anxiety; I was helpless. Then I grew calmer and
collected my faculties. I soon saw my course--for, indeed, there was but the
one course for an intelligent man to pursue. Late as it was, I flew to New =
York
and got a policeman to conduct me to the headquarters of the detective forc=
e.
Fortunately I arrived in time, though the chief of the force, the celebrated
Inspector Blunt was just on the point of leaving for his home. He was a man=
of
middle size and compact frame, and when he was thinking deeply he had a way=
of
kniting his brows and tapping his forehead reflectively with his finger, wh=
ich
impressed you at once with the conviction that you stood in the presence of=
a
person of no common order. The very sight of him gave me confidence and mad=
e me
hopeful. I stated my errand. It did not flurry him in the least; it had no =
more
visible effect upon his iron self-possession than if I had told him somebody
had stolen my dog. He motioned me to a seat, and said, calmly:
"Allow me to think a moment, please."=
;
So saying, he sat down at his office table and
leaned his head upon his hand. Several clerks were at work at the other end=
of
the room; the scratching of their pens was all the sound I heard during the
next six or seven minutes. Meantime the inspector sat there, buried in thou=
ght.
Finally he raised his head, and there was that in the firm lines of his face
which showed me that his brain had done its work and his plan was made. Said
he--and his voice was low and impressive:
"This is no ordinary case. Every step mus=
t be
warily taken; each step must be made sure before the next is ventured. And
secrecy must be observed--secrecy profound and absolute. Speak to no one ab=
out
the matter, not even the reporters. I will take care of them; I will see th=
at
they get only what it may suit my ends to let them know." He touched a
bell; a youth appeared. "Alaric, tell the reporters to remain for the
present." The boy retired. "Now let us proceed to business--and s=
ystematically.
Nothing can be accomplished in this trade of mine without strict and minute
method."
He took a pen and some paper. "Now--name =
of
the elephant?"
"Hassan Ben Ali Ben Selim Abdallah Mohamm=
ed
Moisé Alhammal Jamsetjejeebhoy Dhuleep Sultan Ebu Bhudpoor."
"Very well. Given name?"
"Jumbo."
"Very well. Place of birth?"
"The capital city of Siam."
"Parents living?"
"No--dead."
"Had they any other issue besides this
one?"
"None. He was an only child."
"Very well. These matters are sufficient
under that head. Now please describe the elephant, and leave out no particu=
lar,
however insignificant--that is, insignificant from your point of view. To m=
en in
my profession there are no insignificant particulars; they do not exist.&qu=
ot;
I described, he wrote. When I was done, he sai=
d:
"Now listen. If I have made any mistakes,
correct me."
He read as follows:
"Height, 19 feet; length from apex of
forehead to insertion of tail, 26 feet; length of trunk, 16 feet; length of
tail, 6 feet; total length, including trunk, and tail, 48 feet; length of
tusks, 9 1/2 feet; ears keeping with these dimensions; footprint resembles =
the
mark left when one up-ends a barrel in the snow; color of the elephant, a d=
ull
white; has a hole the size of a plate in each ear for the insertion of jewe=
lry and
possesses the habit in a remarkable degree of squirting water upon spectato=
rs
and of maltreating with his trunk not only such persons as he is acquainted
with, but even entire strangers; limps slightly with his right hind leg, and
has a small scar in his left armpit caused by a former boil; had on, when
stolen, a castle containing seats for fifteen persons, and a gold-cloth
saddle-blanket the size of an ordinary carpet."
There were no mistakes. The inspector touched =
the
bell, handed the description to Alaric, and said:
"Have fifty thousand copies of this print=
ed
at once and mailed to every detective office and pawnbroker's shop on the
continent." Alaric retired. "There--so far, so good. Next, I must
have a photograph of the property."
I gave him one. He examined it critically, and
said:
"It must do, since we can do no better; b=
ut
he has his trunk curled up and tucked into his mouth. That is unfortunate, =
and
is calculated to mislead, for of course he does not usually have it in that
position." He touched his bell.
"Alaric, have fifty thousand copies of th=
is
photograph made the first thing in the morning, and mail them with the
descriptive circulars."
Alaric retired to execute his orders. The
inspector said:
"It will be necessary to offer a reward, =
of
course. Now as to the amount?"
"What sum would you suggest?"
"To begin with, I should say--well,
twenty-five thousand dollars. It is an intricate and difficult business; th=
ere
are a thousand avenues of escape and opportunities of concealment. These
thieves have friends and pals everywhere--"
"Bless me, do you know who they are?"=
;
The wary face, practised in concealing the
thoughts and feelings within, gave me no token, nor yet the replying words,=
so
quietly uttered:
"Never mind about that. I may, and I may =
not.
We generally gather a pretty shrewd inkling of who our man is by the manner=
of
his work and the size of the game he goes after. We are not dealing with a
pickpocket or a hall thief now, make up your mind to that. This property wa=
s not
'lifted' by a novice. But, as I was saying, considering the amount of travel
which will have to be done, and the diligence with which the thieves will c=
over
up their traces as they move along, twenty-five thousand may be too small a=
sum
to offer, yet I think it worth while to start with that."
So we determined upon that figure as a beginni=
ng.
Then this man, whom nothing escaped which could by any possibility be made =
to
serve as a clue, said:
"There are cases in detective history to =
show
that criminals have been detected through peculiarities, in their appetites.
Now, what does this elephant eat, and how much?"
"Well, as to what he eats--he will eat
anything. He will eat a man, he will eat a Bible--he will eat anything betw=
een
a man and a Bible."
"Good very good, indeed, but too general.
Details are necessary--details are the only valuable things in our trade. V=
ery
well--as to men. At one meal--or, if you prefer, during one day--how man men
will he eat, if fresh?"
"He would not care whether they were fres=
h or
not; at a single meal he would eat five ordinary men."
"Very good; five men; we will put that do=
wn.
What nationalities would he prefer?"
"He is indifferent about nationalities. He
prefers acquaintances, but is not prejudiced against strangers."
"Very good. Now, as to Bibles. How many
Bibles would he eat at a meal?"
"He would eat an entire edition."
"It is hardly succinct enough. Do you mean
the ordinary octavo, or the family illustrated?"
"I think he would be indifferent to
illustrations that is, I think he would not value illustrations above simple
letterpress."
"No, you do not get my idea. I refer to b=
ulk.
The ordinary octavo Bible weighs about two pounds and a half, while the gre=
at
quarto with the illustrations weighs ten or twelve. How many Dore Bibles wo=
uld
he eat at a meal?"
"If you knew this elephant, you could not
ask. He would take what they had."
"Well, put it in dollars and cents, then.=
We
must get at it somehow. The Dore costs a hundred dollars a copy, Russia
leather, beveled."
"He would require about fifty thousand
dollars worth--say an edition of five hundred copies."
"Now that is more exact. I will put that
down. Very well; he likes men and Bibles; so far, so good. What else will he
eat? I want particulars."
"He will leave Bibles to eat bricks, he w=
ill
leave bricks to eat bottles, he will leave bottles to eat clothing, he will
leave clothing to eat cats, he will leave cats to eat oysters, he will leave
oysters to eat ham, he will leave ham to eat sugar, he will leave sugar to =
eat
pie, he will leave pie to eat potatoes, he will leave potatoes to eat bran;=
he
will leave bran to eat hay, he will leave hay to eat oats, he will leave oa=
ts
to eat rice, for he was mainly raised on it. There is nothing whatever that=
he
will not eat but European butter, and he would eat that if he could taste
it."
"Very good. General quantity at a meal--s=
ay
about--"
"Well, anywhere from a quarter to half a
ton."
"And he drinks--"
"Everything that is fluid. Milk, water,
whisky, molasses, castor oil, camphene, carbolic acid--it is no use to go i=
nto
particulars; whatever fluid occurs to you set it down. He will drink anythi=
ng
that is fluid, except European coffee."
"Very good. As to quantity?"
"Put it down five to fifteen barrels--his
thirst varies; his other appetites do not."
"These things are unusual. They ought to
furnish quite good clues toward tracing him."
He touched the bell.
"Alaric; summon Captain Burns."
Burns appeared. Inspector Blunt unfolded the w=
hole
matter to him, detail by detail. Then he said in the clear, decisive tones =
of a
man whose plans are clearly defined in his head and who is accustomed to
command:
"Captain Burns, detail Detectives Jones,
Davis, Halsey, Bates, and Hackett to shadow the elephant."
"Yes, sir."
"Detail Detectives Moses, Dakin, Murphy,
Rogers, Tupper, Higgins, and Bartholomew to shadow the thieves."
"Yes, sir."
"Place a strong guard--A guard of thirty
picked men, with a relief of thirty--over the place from whence the elephant
was stolen, to keep strict watch there night and day, and allow none to
approach--except reporters--without written authority from me."
"Yes, sir."
"Place detectives in plain clothes in the
railway; steamship, and ferry depots, and upon all roadways leading out of
Jersey City, with orders to search all suspicious persons."
"Yes, sir."
"Furnish all these men with photograph and
accompanying description of the elephant, and instruct them to search all
trains and outgoing ferryboats and other vessels."
"Yes, sir."
"If the elephant should be found, let him=
be
seized, and the information forwarded to me by telegraph."
"Yes, sir."
"Let me be informed at once if any clues should be found--footprints of the animal, or anything of that kind."<= o:p>
"Yes, sir."
"Get an order commanding the harbor polic=
e to
patrol the frontages vigilantly."
"Yes, sir."
"Despatch detectives in plain clothes over
all the railways, north as far as Canada, west as far as Ohio, south as far=
as
Washington."
"Yes, sir."
"Place experts in all the telegraph offic=
es
to listen to all messages; and let them require that all cipher despatches =
be
interpreted to them."
"Yes, sir."
"Let all these things be done with the
utmost's secrecy--mind, the most impenetrable secrecy."
"Yes, sir."
"Report to me promptly at the usual
hour."
"Yes, Sir."
"Go!"
"Yes, sir."
He was gone.
Inspector Blunt was silent and thoughtful a
moment, while the fire in his eye cooled down and faded out. Then he turned=
to
me and said in a placid voice:
"I am not given to boasting, it is not my=
habit;
but--we shall find the elephant."
I shook him warmly by the hand and thanked him;
and I FELT my thanks, too. The more I had seen of the man the more I liked =
him
and the more I admired him and marveled over the mysterious wonders of his
profession. Then we parted for the night, and I went home with a far happier
heart than I had carried with me to his office.
Next morning it was all in the newspapers, in =
the
minutest detail. It even had additions--consisting of Detective This, Detec=
tive
That, and Detective The Other's "Theory" as to how the robbery was
done, who the robbers were, and whither they had flown with their booty. Th=
ere
were eleven of these theories, and they covered all the possibilities; and =
this
single fact shows what independent thinkers detectives are. No two theories
were alike, or even much resembled each other, save in one striking particu=
lar,
and in that one all the other eleven theories were absolutely agreed. That =
was,
that although the rear of my building was torn out and the only door remain=
ed
locked, the elephant had not been removed through the rent, but by some oth=
er
(undiscovered) outlet. All agreed that the robbers had made that rent only =
to
mislead the detectives. That never would have occurred to me or to any other
layman, perhaps, but it had not deceived the detectives for a moment. Thus,
what I had supposed was the only thing that had no mystery about it was in =
fact
the very thing I had gone furthest astray in. The eleven theories all named=
the
supposed robbers, but no two named the same robbers; the total number of
suspected persons was thirty-seven. The various newspaper accounts all clos=
ed
with the most important opinion of all--that of Chief Inspector Blunt. A
portion of this statement read as follows:
The chief knows who the two principa=
ls
are, namely, "Brick" Duffy and "Red" McFadden. Ten days before the robbery was achieve=
d he
was already aware that it was =
to be
attempted, and had quietly proceeded to shadow these two noted villains; =
but
unfortunately on the night in
question their track was lost, and before it could be found again the bird was flown--that is, the ele=
phant.
D=
uffy
and McFadden are the boldest scoundrels in the profession; the chief has reasons for believing that=
they
are the men who stole the stov=
e out
of the detective headquarters on a bitter night last winter--in consequence of which the =
chief
and every detective present we=
re in
the hands of the physicians before morning, some with frozen feet, others with frozen
fingers, ears, and other membe=
rs.
When I read the first half of that I was more
astonished than ever at the wonderful sagacity of this strange man. He not =
only
saw everything in the present with a clear eye, but even the future could n=
ot
be hidden from him. I was soon at his office, and said I could not help wis=
hing
he had had those men arrested, and so prevented the trouble and loss; but h=
is
reply was simple and unanswerable:
"It is not our province to prevent crime,=
but
to punish it. We cannot punish it until it is committed."
I remarked that the secrecy with which we had
begun had been marred by the newspapers; not only all our facts but all our
plans and purposes had been revealed; even all the suspected persons had be=
en
named; these would doubtless disguise themselves now, or go into hiding.
"Let them. They will find that when I am
ready for them my hand will descend upon them, in their secret places, as
unerringly as the hand of fate. As to the newspapers, we must keep in with
them. Fame, reputation, constant public mention--these are the detective's
bread and butter. He must publish his facts, else he will be supposed to ha=
ve
none; he must publish his theory, for nothing is so strange or striking as =
a detective's
theory, or brings him so much wondering respect; we must publish our plans,=
for
these the journals insist upon having, and we could not deny them without
offending. We must constantly show the public what we are doing, or they wi=
ll
believe we are doing nothing. It is much pleasanter to have a newspaper say,
'Inspector Blunt's ingenious and extraordinary theory is as follows,' than =
to
have it say some harsh thing, or, worse still, some sarcastic one."
"I see the force of what you say. But I
noticed that in one part of your remarks in the papers this morning you ref=
used
to reveal your opinion upon a certain minor point."
"Yes, we always do that; it has a good effect. Besides, I had not formed any opinion on that point, anyway."<= o:p>
I deposited a considerable sum of money with t=
he
inspector, to meet current expenses, and sat down to wait for news. We were
expecting the telegrams to begin to arrive at any moment now. Meantime I re=
read
the newspapers and also our descriptive circular, and observed that our twe=
nty-five
thousand dollars reward seemed to be offered only to detectives. I said I
thought it ought to be offered to anybody who would catch the elephant. The
inspector said:
"It is the detectives who will find the
elephant; hence the reward will go to the right place. If other people found
the animal, it would only be by watching the detectives and taking advantag=
e of
clues and indications stolen from them, and that would entitle the detectiv=
es
to the reward, after all. The proper office of a reward is to stimulate the=
men
who deliver up their time and their trained sagacities to this sort of work,
and not to confer benefits upon chance citizens who stumble upon a capture
without having earned the benefits by their own merits and labors."
This was reasonable enough, certainly. Now the
telegraphic machine in the corner began to click, and the following despatch
was the result:
FLOWER STATION, =
N. Y.,
7.30 A.M. Have got a clue. Found a succession of deep tracks acros=
s a
farm near here. Followed them two miles east without re=
sult;
think elephant went west. Shall now shadow him in that direction.=
DARLEY, Detectiv=
e.
"Darley's one of the best men on the
force," said the inspector. "We shall hear from him again before
long."
Telegram No. 2 came:
BARKER'S, N. J.,=
7.40
A.M. Just arrived. Glass factory broken open here during n=
ight,
and eight hundred bottles
taken. Only water in large quantit=
y near
here is five miles distant.
"That promises well, too," said the
inspector.
"I told you the creature's appetites would
not be bad clues."
Telegram No. 3:
TAYLORVILLE, L. =
I.
8.15 A.M. A haystack near here
disappeared during night. Probably
eaten. Have got a clue, and am=
off. HUBBARD, Detecti=
ve.
"How he does move around!" said the
inspector "I knew we had a difficult job on hand, but we shall catch h=
im
yet."
FLOWER STATION, =
N. Y.,
9 A.M. Shadowed the tracks thr=
ee
miles westward. Large, deep, and r=
agged.
Have just met a farmer who say=
s they
are not elephant-tracks. Says they are holes where he dug up sapli=
ngs
for shade-trees when ground was
frozen last winter. Give me orders=
how
to proceed. DARLEY, Detectiv=
e.
"Aha! a confederate of the thieves! The
thing, grows warm," said the inspector.
He dictated the following telegram to Darley:<= o:p>
Arrest the man and force him to name=
his
pals. Continue to follow the tracks to the Pacific, if necess=
ary. Chief BLUNT.
Next telegram:
CONEY POINT, PA., 8.45 A.M. =
Gas office broken open here during n=
ight
and three months' unpaid gas b=
ills
taken. Have got a clue and am away=
. MURPHY, Detectiv=
e.
"Heavens!" said the inspector;
"would he eat gas bills?"
"Through ignorance--yes; but they cannot
support life. At least, unassisted."
Now came this exciting telegram:
IRONVILLE, N. Y.=
, 9.30
A.M. Just arrived. This village in consternation. Elephant passed through here at five this morning. Some say he went east some say west, some north, some south--but al=
l say
they did not wait to notice,
particularly. He killed a horse; h=
ave
secured a piece of it for a
clue. Killed it with his trunk; fr=
om style
of blow, think he struck it
left-handed. From position in which
horse lies, think elephant tra=
veled
northward along line of Berkley Railway.
Has four and a half hou=
rs'
start, but I move on his track at once. HAWES, Detective=
I uttered exclamations of joy. The inspector w=
as
as self-contained as a graven image. He calmly touched his bell.
"Alaric, send Captain Burns here."
Burns appeared.
"How many men are ready for instant
orders?"
"Ninety-six, sir."
"Send them north at once. Let them
concentrate along the line of the Berkley road north of Ironville."
"Yes, sir."
"Let them conduct their movements with the
utmost secrecy. As fast as others are at liberty, hold them for orders.&quo=
t;
"Yes, sir."
"Go!"
"Yes, sir."
Presently came another telegram:
SAGE CORNERS, N.=
Y.,
10.30. Just arrived. Elephant passed through here at 8.15. All escaped from the town but a policeman. Apparently elephant did not strike at policeman, but at the lamp-post.<=
span
style=3D'mso-spacerun:yes'> Got both.
I have secured a portio=
n of
the policeman as clue. STUMM, Detective=
.
"So the elephant has turned westward,&quo=
t;
said the inspector. "However, he will not escape, for my men are scatt=
ered
all over that region."
The next telegram said:
GLOVER'S, 11.15 =
Just
arrived. Village deserted, except sick and aged. Elephant passed through
three-quarters of an hour ago. The anti-temperance mass-meeting was in sess=
ion;
he put his trunk in at a window and washed it out with water from cistern. =
Some
swallowed it--since dead; several drowned. Detectives Cross and O'Shaughnes=
sy
were passing through town, but going south--so missed elephant. Whole region
for many miles around in terror--people flying from their homes. Wherever t=
hey
turn they meet elephant, and many are killed. BRANT, Detective.
I could have shed tears, this havoc so distres=
sed
me. But the inspector only said:
"You see--we are closing in on him. He fe=
els
our presence; he has turned eastward again."
Yet further troublous news was in store for us.
The telegraph brought this:
HOGANSPORT, 12.1=
9. Just arrived. Elephant passed through half an hour ag=
o,
creating wildest fright and
excitement. Elephant raged around
streets; two plumbers going by,
killed one--other escaped. Regret
general. O'FLAHERTY, Dete=
ctive.
"Now he is right in the midst of my
men," said the inspector. "Nothing can save him."
A succession of telegrams came from detectives=
who
were scattered through New Jersey and Pennsylvania, and who were following
clues consisting of ravaged barns, factories, and Sunday-school libraries, =
with
high hopes-hopes amounting to certainties, indeed. The inspector said:
"I wish I could communicate with them and
order them north, but that is impossible. A detective only visits a telegra=
ph
office to send his report; then he is off again, and you don't know where to
put your hand on him."
Now came this despatch:
BRIDGEPORT, CT., 12.1=
5. Barnum offers rate of
4,000 a year for exclusive privilege of using =
elephant as traveling advertising me=
dium
from now till detectives find
him. Wants to paste circus-posters=
on
him. Desires immediate answer.=
BOGGS, Detective=
.
"That is perfectly absurd!" I exclai=
med.
"Of course it is," said the inspecto=
r.
"Evidently Mr. Barnum, who thinks he is so sharp, does not know me--bu=
t I
know him."
Then he dictated this answer to the despatch:<= o:p>
Mr. Barnum's offer declined. Make it
7,000 or nothing. Chief BLUNT.
"There. We shall not have to wait long fo=
r an
answer. Mr. Barnum is not at home; he is in the telegraph office--it is his=
way
when he has business on hand. Inside of three--"
Done.--P. T. BARNUM.
So interrupted the clicking telegraphic
instrument. Before I could make a comment upon this extraordinary episode, =
the
following despatch carried my thoughts into another and very distressing
channel:
BOLIVIA, N. Y., =
12.50.
Elephant arrived here from the=
south
and passed through toward the =
forest
at 11.50, dispersing a funeral on the way, and diminishing the mourners by two. Citizens fired some small cannon-balls =
into him, and then fled. Detective Burke and I arrived ten minut=
es later, from the north, but mistook s=
ome
excavations for footprints, an=
d so
lost a good deal of time; but at last we struck the right trail and followed it to the woods.<=
span
style=3D'mso-spacerun:yes'> We then got down on our hands and knees and continued to keep a sh=
arp
eye on the track, and so shado=
wed it
into the brush. Burke was in
advance. Unfortunately the animal had stopped to rest; ther=
efore,
Burke having his head down, in=
tent
upon the track, butted up against the elephant's hind legs before he was aware of his
vicinity. Burke instantly arose to=
his feet, seized the tail, and excla=
imed
joyfully, "I claim the re--" but got no further, for a
single blow of the huge trunk laid the brave fellow's fragments low in
death. I fled rearward, and the elephant turned and shadowed me to t=
he
edge of the wood, making treme=
ndous
speed, and I should inevitably have been lost, but that the
remains of the funeral providentially intervened again and diverted his attention. I have just learned that nothing of tha=
t funeral is now left; but this is no =
loss,
for there is abundance of mate=
rial
for another. Meantime, the elephan=
t has
disappeared again. MULROONEY, Detec=
tive.
We heard no news except from the diligent and
confident detectives scattered about New Jersey, Pennsylvania, Delaware, and
Virginia--who were all following fresh and encouraging clues--until shortly
after 2 P.M., when this telegram came:
BAXTER CENTER, 2=
.15. Elephant been here, plastered over w=
ith
circus-bills, and he broke up a
revival, striking down and damaging many who were on the point of entering upon a better life. Citizens penned him up and established =
a guard.
When Detective Brown and I arrived, some time after, we entered inclosure and proceeded to
identify elephant by photograph and
description. All marks tallied exa=
ctly
except one, which we could not
see--the boil-scar under armpit. T=
o make
sure, Brown crept under to loo=
k, and
was immediately brained--that is, head crushed and destroyed, though nothing
issued from debris. All fled so did elephant, striking right and =
left
with much effect. Has escaped, but left bold blood-track f=
rom
cannon-wounds. Rediscovery certain.
He broke southward, through a dense forest. BRENT, Detective=
.
That was the last telegram. At nightfall a fog
shut down which was so dense that objects but three feet away could not be
discerned. This lasted all night. The ferry-boats and even the omnibuses ha=
d to
stop running.
Next morning the papers were as full of detect=
ive
theories as before; they had all our tragic facts in detail also, and a gre=
at
many more which they had received from their telegraphic correspondents. Co=
lumn
after column was occupied, a third of its way down, with glaring head-lines,
which it made my heart sick to read. Their general tone was like this:
THE WHITE ELEPHANT AT LARGE! HE MOVES UPON HIS FATAL MARCH! WHOLE VILLAGES DESERTED BY THEIR FRIGHT-ST=
RICKEN
OCCUPANTS! PALE TERROR GOES BEFORE HIM, DEATH AND DEVASTATI=
ON
FOLLOW AFTER! AFTER THESE, THE DETECTIVES! BARNS DESTROYED, FACTORIES GUTTED, HARV=
ESTS DEVOURED, PUBLIC ASSEMBLAGES DISPERS=
ED,
ACCOMPANIED BY SCENES OF CARNA=
GE
IMPOSSIBLE TO DESCRIBE! THEORIES OF
THIRTY-FOUR OF THE MOST DISTINGUISHED DETECTIVES ON THE
FORCE! THEORY OF CHIEF BLUNT!
"There!" said Inspector Blunt, almost
betrayed into excitement, "this is magnificent! This is the greatest
windfall that any detective organization ever had. The fame of it will trav=
el
to the ends of the earth, and endure to the end of time, and my name with
it."
But there was no joy for me. I felt as if I had
committed all those red crimes, and that the elephant was only my irrespons=
ible
agent. And how the list had grown! In one place he had "interfered wit=
h an
election and killed five repeaters." He had followed this act with the
destruction of two pool fellows, named O'Donohue and McFlannigan, who had
"found a refuge in the home of the oppressed of all lands only the day
before, and were in the act of exercising for the first time the noble righ=
t of
American citizens at the polls, when stricken down by the relentless hand of
the Scourge of Siam." In another, he had "found a crazy sensation=
-preacher
preparing his next season's heroic attacks on the dance, the theater, and o=
ther
things which can't strike back, and had stepped on him." And in still
another place he had "killed a lightning-rod agent." And so the l=
ist
went on, growing redder and redder, and more and more heartbreaking. Sixty
persons had been killed, and two hundred and forty wounded. All the accounts
bore just testimony to the activity and devotion of the detectives, and all
closed with the remark that "three hundred thousand citizens and four
detectives saw the dread creature, and two of the latter he destroyed."=
;
I dreaded to hear the telegraphic instrument b=
egin
to click again. By and by the messages began to pour in, but I was happily
disappointed in their nature. It was soon apparent that all trace of the
elephant was lost. The fog had enabled him to search out a good hiding-plac=
e unobserved.
Telegrams from the most absurdly distant points reported that a dim vast ma=
ss
had been glimpsed there through the fog at such and such an hour, and was
"undoubtedly the elephant." This dim vast mass had been glimpsed =
in
New Haven, in New Jersey, in Pennsylvania, in interior New York, in Brookly=
n,
and even in the city of New York itself! But in all cases the dim vast mass=
had
vanished quickly and left no trace. Every detective of the large force
scattered over this huge extent of country sent his hourly report, and each=
and
every one of them had a clue, and was shadowing something, and was hot upon=
the
heels of it.
But the day passed without other result.
The next day the same.
The next just the same.
The newspaper reports began to grow monotonous
with facts that amounted to nothing, clues which led to nothing, and theori=
es
which had nearly exhausted the elements which surprise and delight and dazz=
le.
By advice of the inspector I doubled the rewar=
d.
Four more dull days followed. Then came a bitt=
er
blow to the poor, hard-working detectives--the journalists declined to print
their theories, and coldly said, "Give us a rest."
Two weeks after the elephant's disappearance I
raised the reward to seventy-five thousand dollars by the inspector's advic=
e.
It was a great sum, but I felt that I would rather sacrifice my whole priva=
te
fortune than lose my credit with my government. Now that the detectives wer=
e in
adversity, the newspapers turned upon them, and began to fling the most sti=
nging
sarcasms at them. This gave the minstrels an idea, and they dressed themsel=
ves
as detectives and hunted the elephant on the stage in the most extravagant =
way.
The caricaturists made pictures of detectives scanning the country with
spy-glasses, while the elephant, at their backs, stole apples out of their
pockets. And they made all sorts of ridiculous pictures of the detective
badge--you have seen that badge printed in gold on the back of detective no=
vels
no doubt, it is a wide-staring eye, with the legend, "WE NEVER
SLEEP." When detectives called for a drink, the would-be facetious
barkeeper resurrected an obsolete form of expression and said, "Will y=
ou
have an eye-opener?" All the air was thick with sarcasms.
But there was one man who moved calm, untouche=
d,
unaffected, through it all. It was that heart of oak, the chief inspector. =
His
brave eye never drooped, his serene confidence never wavered. He always sai=
d:
"Let them rail on; he laughs best who lau=
ghs
last."
My admiration for the man grew into a species =
of
worship. I was at his side always. His office had become an unpleasant plac=
e to
me, and now became daily more and more so. Yet if he could endure it I mean=
t to
do so also--at least, as long as I could. So I came regularly, and stayed--=
the
only outsider who seemed to be capable of it. Everybody wondered how I coul=
d;
and often it seemed to me that I must desert, but at such times I looked in=
to
that calm and apparently unconscious face, and held my ground.
About three weeks after the elephant's disappe=
arance
I was about to say, one morning, that I should have to strike my colors and
retire, when the great detective arrested the thought by proposing one more
superb and masterly move.
This was to compromise with the robbers. The
fertility of this man's invention exceeded anything I have ever seen, and I
have had a wide intercourse with the world's finest minds. He said he was
confident he could compromise for one hundred thousand dollars and recover =
the elephant.
I said I believed I could scrape the amount together, but what would become=
of
the poor detectives who had worked so faithfully? He said:
"In compromises they always get half.&quo=
t;
This removed my only objection. So the inspect=
or
wrote two notes, in this form:
DEAR MADAM,--Your husband can make a=
large
sum of money (and be entirely
protected from the law) by making an immediate, appointment with me. Chief BLUNT.
He sent one of these by his confidential messe=
nger
to the "reputed wife" of Brick Duffy, and the other to the reputed
wife of Red McFadden.
Within the hour these offensive answers came:<= o:p>
YE OWLD FOOL: brick McDuffys bin ded=
2
yere. B=
RIDGET
MAHONEY.
C=
HIEF
BAT,--Red McFadden is hung and in heving 18 month. Any Ass but a detective know that. M=
ARY
O'HOOLIGAN.
"I had long suspected these facts," =
said
the inspector; "this testimony proves the unerring accuracy of my
instinct."
The moment one resource failed him he was ready
with another. He immediately wrote an advertisement for the morning papers,=
and
I kept a copy of it:
A.--xwblv.242 N. Tjnd--fz328wmlg. Oz=
po,--;
2m! ogw. Mum
He said that if the thief was alive this would
bring him to the usual rendezvous. He further explained that the usual
rendezvous was a place where all business affairs between detectives and
criminals were conducted. This meeting would take place at twelve the next
night.
We could do nothing till then, and I lost no t=
ime
in getting out of the office, and was grateful indeed for the privilege.
At eleven the next night I brought one hundred
thousand dollars in bank-notes and put them into the chief's hands, and sho=
rtly
afterward he took his leave, with the brave old undimmed confidence in his =
eye.
An almost intolerable hour dragged to a close; then I heard his welcome tre=
ad,
and rose gasping and tottered to meet him. How his fine eyes flamed with
triumph! He said:
"We've compromised! The jokers will sing a
different tune to-morrow! Follow me!"
He took a lighted candle and strode down into =
the
vast vaulted basement where sixty detectives always slept, and where a score
were now playing cards to while the time. I followed close after him. He wa=
lked
swiftly down to the dim remote end of the place, and just as I succumbed to=
the
pangs of suffocation and was swooning away he stumbled and fell over the ou=
tlying
members of a mighty object, and I heard him exclaim as he went down:
"Our noble profession is vindicated. Here=
is
your elephant!"
I was carried to the office above and restored
with carbolic acid. The whole detective force swarmed in, and such another
season of triumphant rejoicing ensued as I had never witnessed before. The
reporters were called, baskets of champagne were opened, toasts were drunk,=
the
handshakings and congratulations were continuous and enthusiastic. Naturally
the chief was the hero of the hour, and his happiness was so complete and h=
ad
been so patiently and worthily and bravely won that it made me happy to see=
it,
though I stood there a homeless beggar, my priceless charge dead, and my
position in my country's service lost to me through what would always seem =
my
fatally careless execution of a great trust. Many an eloquent eye testified=
its
deep admiration for the chief, and many a detective's voice murmured,
"Look at him--just the king of the profession; only give him a clue, i=
t's
all he wants, and there ain't anything hid that he can't find." The
dividing of the fifty thousand dollars made great pleasure; when it was
finished the chief made a little speech while he put his share in his pocke=
t,
in which he said, "Enjoy it, boys, for you've earned it; and, more than
that, you've earned for the detective profession undying fame."
A telegram arrived, which read:
MONROE, MICH., 1= 0 P.M. First time I've struck a telegraph office in over three weeks. Have followed those footprints, horseback, through the woods, a thousand miles to here, a= nd they get stronger and bigger and fresher every day. Don't worry-inside of another week I'll have the elephant. This is dead sure. DARLEY, Detective.<= o:p>
The chief ordered three cheers for "Darle=
y,
one of the finest minds on the force," and then commanded that he be
telegraphed to come home and receive his share of the reward.
So ended that marvelous episode of the stolen
elephant. The newspapers were pleasant with praises once more, the next day,
with one contemptible exception. This sheet said, "Great is the detect=
ive!
He may be a little slow in finding a little thing like a mislaid elephant h=
e may
hunt him all day and sleep with his rotting carcass all night for three wee=
ks,
but he will find him at last if he can get the man who mislaid him to show =
him
the place!"
Poor Hassan was lost to me forever. The cannon=
shots
had wounded him fatally, he had crept to that unfriendly place in the fog, =
and
there, surrounded by his enemies and in constant danger of detection, he ha=
d wasted
away with hunger and suffering till death gave him peace.
The compromise cost me one hundred thousand
dollars; my detective expenses were forty-two thousand dollars more; I never
applied for a place again under my government; I am a ruined man and a wand=
erer
in the earth, but my admiration for that man, whom I believe to be the grea=
test
detective the world has ever produced, remains undimmed to this day, and wi=
ll
so remain unto the end.